Lee and I have a neighbor whose apartment is constantly stinking up our hall with the smell of cat litter. It got so bad at one point that Lee and Brittni shoved an anonymous note under the door. I don’t remember exactly what it said, but I think the P.S. was something along the lines of: “We saw your cat in the hall. Is it peeing there? Not cool.”

Today, I came home to a new smell. It was unpleasant, and it filled the entire hallway. By the time I got back to my apartment, I decided it was probably gas from a stove. I called the building’s front desk, where friendly neighborhood doorman Dan Love answered and directed me to meet him by the elevator. He led me from door to door, sniffing with him to determine the source of the odor. We agreed that it was Stinky Cat Neighbor’s door. I told Dan I had to hit the bathroom and I’d catch him later, not wanting to be visually connected in Stinky Cat Neighbor’s mind with the note she ignored. My apartment door closed just as hers opened, following Dan’s knock.

A few moments later, Dan knocked on my door to thank me for saving the building from certain destruction. Stinky Neighbor had indeed left the stove on, spouting out enough gas to diffuse through not only her entire apartment, but the entire hallway as well. Now I can only wait and wonder what will be next in the series of my neighbor’s nefarious scent-related crimes.